The biggest challenge with
romantic relationships is having excellent communication. It's also the single
most powerful thing you can do to maintain a great long-term relationship.
Sadly, men and women tend to have very different styles of expressing
themselves.
Unfortunately, men get the short end of the stick. Women aren't usually as straightforward as men when it comes to communicating. Many of us grew up believing that if a man really loved us, they would "just know" how to please us. I know that not only is that untrue, it's also really unfair to men. But the fact remains that it's one of the unrealistic expectations little girls are fed in their formative years.
Unfortunately, men get the short end of the stick. Women aren't usually as straightforward as men when it comes to communicating. Many of us grew up believing that if a man really loved us, they would "just know" how to please us. I know that not only is that untrue, it's also really unfair to men. But the fact remains that it's one of the unrealistic expectations little girls are fed in their formative years.
1. We're suckers for romance
You probably know that, right?
Never ask, "Do you want flowers". Just do it. If we have to ask for
it, it doesn't count. If you really want to impress your girlfriend,
you'll get major brownie points for sitting through a chick flick with her. On
the other hand, the little things count just as much as the major gestures.
Sending a card for no reason is one way to make her melt.
2. Please listen to us
I know it can be hard because we
talk so much. But when you don't listen, we take it as a sign of disrespect and it really pisses us off. When you listen, it's great
if you check in by verbally agreeing occasionally or even questioning to get
clarity about what we mean. When you get that glazed look in your eyes, we know
we've lost you.
3. If you ask, we'll tell you exactly what sexually makes us
melt
The trick is to ask in the
moment. If you ask over dinner, most women will be too uncomfortable to give
you a straight answer. But if you're doing it almost perfectly and ask what
else you should do, she’ll beg you for it. And here's a big hint: Real women
don't respond to sex the way porn stars do. It takes a little time for our motors to warm up.
4. When you give a compliment, be specific
I know I have nice legs, but if
you tell me you love how my thigh curves “like that,” it’s a real turn-on.
Also, you should know that you can never give too many compliments, as long as
they're sincere. Really. Even the most confident women I know don't get sick of
being complimented.
5. Never, ever forget a birthday or anniversary
See No. 1 for reference. In
fact, see No. 2 as well. Write it down, or double check for the birthday on
Facebook. Don’t even joke about forgetting either one; we won’t think it’s
funny. There’s just no excuse.
Bodyandsoul
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